Cooksopp
by AllBlueChaser
Summary: A collection of Sanji/Usopp drabbles from OPyaoi100 over the years.
1. Treasures

Title: Where one saves another  
words: 300~!  
pairing: Usopp/Sanji (and some Zoro nakamaship to both thrown in there)  
rating: E for emo...jK, let's call it PG13 for all the blood I'm picturing.  
topic:Emotion  
written: 8-26-2008

* * *

Sanjis hand was strangely warm considering. Usopp cradled it in his, keeping the pressure firm.

He wouldn't let it slip from his grasp even if the blood was making it more difficult.

The crew turned to him as he burst into the room.

Nami shrieked at him.

"USOPP! Where were you?! We thought...maybe you had been killed..." Her voice trailed off as she spotted Sanjis hand clutched in his. "Sanji..."

Usopp gulped back his frustration that she only just now noticed, but upon a passing glance most of his nakama apparently hadn't known in the confusion. He panted and steadied his voice.

"I had to go back for him. I couldn't..." Emotion started to seep back in. It had been so scary running back toward the thing that had done this to the chef...but he couldn't leave Sanji this way.

Chopper began making preparations. The crew silently observed the cooks sliced and battered body for a moment. Usopp more so, not sure yet how bad Sanjis injuries truly were.

Zoro clicked his tongue. He had known of course. He had seen it happen. Had been the one to carry him back to the ship, unconscious and bleeding.

"The idiot cook can't keep track of his treasures very well."

Zoros tone and knowing glance told volumes.

That Sanji would survive. That Usopp had been included in that statement. That Zoro at least knew WHY he had to go back. And a subtle confidence that with the cooks precious items back with him, the chef would be sure to make a full recovery-hand and all.

Usopp took a breath and walked to the other side of the bed after Chopper took his fleshy cargo, taking Sanjis other and firmly attached hand in his.

"Just this once...I'll forgive him for being so careless."


	2. Your Pants, Locked ON!

title: Pants locked on! *wait...wrong technique!*  
pairing: Sanji/Usopp  
Rating: pg 13  
words: 148  
Topic: Emotion (panic)  
Written: 8-24-2008

* * *

Usopp centered himself, took a deep breath, closed his eyes in concentration and dramatically threw his arm toward the door of the boys bunk...not noticing Sanji walking in at that moment to retrieve a jacket.

"Usopp...SPELL!!"

Sanji froze and looked at Usopp in confusion. What did the idiot think he was doing?

"An egg sac you never noticed bursts in your pants! Thousands of tiny spiders..."

A shriek had Usopp open his eyes in concern only to find the handsome blond chef, struggling, not able to get out of his pants fast enough standing before him.

Usopp Spells could be used for this? He would have to think about this more later...

Right now though Sanji's ass twitched pleasantly as he finally released his belt in panic.

Hmm...better help him out, Usopp thought. He was pretty certain he could lend the chef a hand in more ways than one.


	3. Thanks for the Fish

title: Thank you for all the (razor)Fish  
words: 300  
topic: sinking  
rating:G  
Pairing: Usopp/Sanji

written: 9-9-2008 

/////////////////////////

His goggles were sinking.

Sure the great captain Usopp had, as expected, saved the day! The log pose, Luffy, a minty jelly lamb roast, and shampoo had all threatened to fly overboard when he snatched each item coolly in turn from the air, placing them on the deck.

How those items had somehow gotten together and were on the verge of flying overboard he had no clue, except that Luffy must have been involved.

During his catching escapades though his goggles had slipped off and into the water. He had immediately thought to jump in when he spotted the glint of the silvered scales of the razor fish. DAMN! There were a pocket of those things back on the north end of Syrup Island…their teeth were long and sharp enough to make knives with!

One of the fish rose it's head from the water holding the googles between it's teeth and then swallowed them in a mocking smile.

Usopp turned and noticed Sanji had already collected his Lamb dish and was heading back to the galley. Usopp felt a pang of disappointment. No thank you?

Dinner time later that night they had fish and Usopp found his goggles sitting on his chair out of view from the others. He looked to Sanji in wonder.

"Cook-san, aren't these fish dangerous?" Robin had been asking.

"The day I am defeated by a fish is the day I hang up my apron."

Zoro had made some comment concerning that and they were fighting until Nami cut in.

"But Sanji-kun? You said this morning that you were doing that pheasant dish tonight…"

"Ah, Nami-san! These fish are specific to this island and I thought this would be a good chance."

Usopp grinned silently as he put another delicious fork full into his mouth.

Liar.


	4. A Simple Proposal

Title: Simple.  
topic: Proposal  
words: 89  
rating: G  
written: 12-2-2008 

///////////////////////

The proposal was simple.

I'm the captain.

For my dream to come true there will be grand adventure.

I'll need nakama. A first mate and a cook.

In return I'll make your dream come true. Keep you company.

Kiss you on the beach when we find your ocean.

Of course that would mean leaving the Sunny. Luffy.

So he didn't expect Sanji to answer so quickly. So he had to ask.

"Any chef worth his salt would kill to cook for the pirate king. He knew you'd ask. Knew I'd accept. Dinner is at seven…captain."

Usopp couldn't help but grin.


	5. High School AU Track Team 1

Title: Left behind in front  
rating: g  
topic: class  
pairing: Usopp/Sanji  
words:269  
notes: School AU  
written: 8-8-2008  
//////////////

Despite his boasts of being the fastest runner in the class, it didn't bring him the fame and respect he would have expected.

It was their fault. The school monsters.

Usopp could practically hear the questions in his classmates heads. 'Sure Usopp is fastest but that's only because Zoro isn't in track." Or 'Luffy could take any record in the state if he put his mind to it.'

He suspected they thought about Sanji too. But Sanji was on track so they really didn't have an excuse for him. Usopp was pretty sure it was the large amount of pretty girls in Sanjis' fan club cheering for him. The distraction must be it.

Usopp smacked himself in the forehead at the thought…he was basically admitting that he thought the schools playboy could beat him too!

But he did have long legs. Very long legs. And he had seen Sanji run when he had no distractions and thought it was important. The time Usopp had tripped and almost had twisted an ankle, the blond had been across the field on the other side of the track lazily running around the corner and then was by his side mere seconds later.

One day after Sanji had come in a very close second place behind Usopp without breaking a sweat, he confronted the blond. He had shrugged and handed Usopp a towel before responding.

"If I'm in front I feel like I'm running away from you. It's more fun to chase after your back."

"Oh." There was something in the blonds eyes that had captured the other runner. Something meaningful. "OH!!! Um...Thanks."


	6. High School AU Track Team 2

_**I know you know**_  
Title: I know and now so does he  
Pairing: Sanji/Usopp  
Rating: nc-17  
topic: Camera  
words:300  
Notes: High school track team AU

Written: 11-25-2009

/////////////////////////////////////////

Sanji was not gay. It was something the blond insisted on over and over. Usopp didn't really mind it, he understood that with Sanjis weird upbringing being seen that way was totally unacceptable. What did puzzle him though was how someone so confidant with tireless libido toward him could turn around and deny any sort of attraction toward men.

From the first time when Sanji had cornered him in the showers after the track meet…slipping his lean naked body into Usopps stream of hot water, pressing in close to share it.

"The other showers are cold." He had said as if it were perfectly normal to hijack a shower while someone was still in it. Sanji ran his hands down Usopps soapy chest and back, then stomach, and further until he was palming the erection Usopp had been secretly sporting since spotting the blond slowly strip his clothes off five minutes before. Sanji stroked it and Usopp felt the impressive flesh between the other mans legs rise and grind into his hip. He couldn't be positive with the distraction but he was pretty the blond had been kissing his neck while guiding him to orgasm.

Sanji never made mention of it and acted perfectly normal afterward when anyone was around…but when Usopp was alone he suddenly had a secret insatiable boyfriend.

None he told would believe him. Himself included.

The camera in the locker room was set up to capture this proof.

Sure enough the blond had pounced, stripping the curly haired boy naked, kissing, and ravishing him until they collapsed, satisfied.

"I'm not gay."

"I know."

"I hate men…smelly, shitty, beasts…"

"I know."

"…I love you though." Sanji continued.

"That I _didn't_ know."

"I know."

"I'm recording us." Usopp admitted.

"That's how I knew you needed to hear it."


	7. A college AU, RA Sanji

Title: Half-way proposition  
Pairing: Usopp/Sanji  
rating:pg  
words: 180  
topic: Orgy  
Notes: AU- College  
written: 1-1-2009

///////////////////////

"Oi Sanji…why did you decide to go to college? You're already a gourmet cook…it's not like you need to be here."

Sanji pushed the black curls aside and placed the cool washcloth against his most innocent resident. It was a wonder the boy could have drank one cup of beer without passing out and not the ten he was claiming. Claiming ten probably meant two…or maybe three. Still very impressive for Usopp, although dealing with drunken co-eds was not his idea of a good time.

"Easy. Drunken orgies."

That caused the boy to laugh and hiccup painfully.

"Then why did you become an RA?"

"That's the real question, I guess." Sanji sighed.

"It's so you have a reason…not to be disappointed." Usopp slurred mid hiccup.

Sanji had to laugh.

"Hey don't kill my dream. I know they exist. I've heard stories."

"But this gives you an excuse…if you find one and weren't invited."

"What?! No…that…"

"Shhhh…it's okay Sanji…I'd invite you to my drunken orgy. Heck!" He suddenly looped his arms around the blonds neck in affection. "We're halfway there already."


	8. Tastes Sweet

Title: Sticky balls of flavor  
words:431 (oh well)  
Pairing: Sanji/Uso/Luff  
rating: Nc-17ish  
topic: restrained sanji  
written: 11-20-2008

"MMmm! Usopp, your sticky balls taste delicious!"

Usopp smacked his captain on the back of the head despite how funny he looked right now…mouth nearly glued shut with the sticky sweet whiteness.

"It's sticky _stars_ not sticky _balls_." He corrected with a knowing nod. "And don't eat them all! These are my newest weapon! I will defeat any enemy! No one can escape the sticky balls, er I mean, _stars_ of Captain Usopp!"

"Wow! Are they that cool?"

"Are they?! A demonstration is in order!" Usopp took aim with his slingshot, sticky star loaded, across the deck and down the open hall. "Now imagine our victim is walking from the bathroom to the mens bunk…" The sniper whispered as he fired.

The white pellet flew down the hall right on target…when Sanji stepped from the bathroom fresh from the shower and only a towel tucked around his waist, heading back to the bunk.

There was a crash and swearing…and a towel on the floor and a naked cook pinned to the far hall wall naked and covered with the white sticky goo.

Usopp and Luffy were there in a flash.

"I'm sorry Sanji…you got in the line of fire!"

"Look." The cooks tone was deadly and didn't at all match the blush starting to cross his cheeks. "I will kick your asses later. Just get me the fuck down and hand me my towel."

Suddenly his cheeks went from pink to bright red and eyes nearly grew wide. Usopps mouth dropped open in horror.

Luffy licked at Sanjis right nipple again.

"Mmm…it's even better out of your balls!" Mumbled between sucking and licking the cooks flesh.

Usopp gripped the towel he had picked up tighter as the sight of Luffys tongue dragging across the cooks body started to fill him with a hot rush he sure wasn't appropriate. A quick look showed Sanji wasn't fairing much better, obviously aroused, and with a look torn between fury and moaning.

Luffy pulled away suddenly and ran off, calling behind him the need for something to drink.

Sanji was panting lightly, his face flushed, and the one place Luffy hadn't shown any attention was hard and seeping longingly.

To Usopp, he looked deliciously needy and full of want. It occurred to him that while he had put lots of sugar and honey into the stars formula he never actually tasted it himself.

He never wanted to taste anything more than at this moment.

"Do you…uh…want me to finish? Or do you want the towel?"

Sanji mumbled something before looking away.

Usopp dropped the towel. He wouldn't be needing it.


	9. Self Interrupted

_**Self interrupted**_  
Title: What to do before dinner  
words: 282  
pairing: Usopp/Sanji  
rating: Nc-17  
topic: Interloper  
written: 10-29-2008

Usopp stroked himself faster. Dinner was soon. He really didn't want to enter the galley with a freaking tent poking so obviously through his overalls.

Damn it…if only Sanji hadn't looked at Nami with those smoldering eyes when the sniper was in its direct path. Of course perhaps Usopp should admit that occurrence wouldn't have done much if it hadn't been for the little daydream he had been having at the time where Sanji was beckoning to him partially dressed, whip cream in hand…murmuring about having something he wanted the sniper to taste.

He bit his lip at the memory. He really needed to stop this sort of thing…he couldn't just sneak away every time the cook inadvertently turned him on! He started panting as his tugs became sloppy, the sensation trumping technique. Suddenly he was vaguely aware of an interruption for the better.

He groaned as a hand expertly began to jack him off and he was thinking maybe Sogeking had decided to come out and take matters in his own hands but it was a waft of smoke that drifted in front of his eyes that told him the truth.

He barely had time to gasp out Sanjis name before he came writhing under the cooks grasp and leaving the chefs hand splattered with flecks of white. His head spun and tried to catch his breath. Sanjis face was right next to his and he licked at his sticky hand idly as if some mistake in baking had left a trail of honey done his fingers and palm.

"Dinners up. Don't forget to wash your hands…" Came the husky whisper.

Then the cook was at the door…and the sniper was blushing…and hard again.


	10. The Special

Title: The Special  
Topic:Free  
Words: 346  
Pairing: Usopp/Sanji  
Rating:Gish

Written: 8-19-2008 

///////////////////////////////

Usopp stooped down and patted the cute little girl on her head.

"Thanks for showing me the way to the market!" The sniper hadn't meant to get turned around but the town was twisty and hard to get his bearings of. Zoro wouldn't stand a chance. He'd probably be roped in trying to find him later.

The girl looked up at him expectantly.

"Buy me something?"

Gah. The nerve of this girl! He hadn't been THAT lost. Well she was cute…and did remind him a little of a smaller Nami. Maybe he'd pretend he was like Sanji for a moment and indulge her.

A glanced around. Besides the fancy foods and ingredients there were also pretty flower arrangements. A simple but elegant arrangement caught his eye with the bright colors. There was also a sign that said 'special deal!'.

"Ok…" He made up his mind and strode up to the clerk with the shopping list Sanji had given him. "I'd like all this and the flowers there on special. That one with the bright colors should go to this little girl."

The clerk took the list and the after a smile and cursory glance at the list.

"And the rest?"

"Oh, can you deliver the rest to the ship in port? Attention Sanji?" When the clerk nodded Usopp dug into his pockets for the grocery money and then into his bag for his personal funds for the flowers and delivery charge. He paid gladly willing to pay extra not to haul everything. A quick thank you and he was off for another Captain Usopp adventure that didn't involve errands.

Later that evening Usopp was surprised when Sanji came behind him, kissing his neck sweetly before nuzzling behind his ear.

"Flowers, no matter how beautiful, shouldn't be given to a man. But I think your chivalrous efforts still need thanking."

Usopp noticed then the familiar looking flower arrangement on the table, card sticking up reading 'Sanji'.

Apparently the special was buy one get one free.

Sanjis thank you even later was special on a whole other level.


	11. Bargaining

Title: Bargaining  
Pairing: Usopp/Sanjii  
words: 237  
rating: G  
topic: compromise  
written: 8-7-2008

God. Goddess. Gods. Nature. Spirit. Whoever you are, if you exsist at all. Let's compromise.

It is my fault he is like this. My fault he watches my back instead of his own. My own weakness. So it is only fair I be the one to pay the price.

Let him pull through, stand up with a wry comment, put a cig to his lips and walk to the kitchen. Let him at least breathe, move, and let us know his heart is still functioning.

I'd offer my life in exchange but it wouldn't measure up to his.

Let him live to follow his dreams and live as he pleases a little longer and I'll give you all of my emotion I have for him. That is stronger than my life and more valuable than the rarest gems. I won't touch him again. I'll disappear from his sight, never to distract him again.

Hell, take whatever you want of mine…make it hurt because I deserve it, just let him live.

A large callused hand falls onto his.

"Masochistic long nose, what if I want to touch you? Be felt by you? Wouldn't your little deal directly interfere with me living as I please?"

Usopp squeezed back as Chopper continued to run around the injured cook.

"Sanji…."

"Yeah?"

"Did I really just say all that out loud?"

"Give me a kiss and I'll never tell." The blond grinned.


	12. Paradise

Title: Paradise  
Pairing: Usopp/Sanji  
words: 248  
rating:G (unless you count mental nudity)  
topic: Nude Beach  
written: 7/29/2008

//////////////

"So where would you live?" Usopp asked as he took another sip of his delicious cocktail Sanji had made the crew earlier in the evening.

"In All Blue?" Sanji clarified and the sniper nodded. "Well it is an ocean, if I'm lucky there is a nice island near by with lots of fresh water and edible vegetation. I'll buy or build a place by the beach."

"Sounds like paradise." Usopp returned the blindingly bright grin Sanji had inadvertently slipped into. The smile was reason enough to bring up the blonds dream from time to time.

"Well sort of."

That caused Usopp to carefully consider his friend. Never before had All Blue been called anything but perfect.

"Sort of?"

"Well it occurred to me, what I could use is a handsome lifeguard to taste my cooking and keep me company." The smile faded a little and the blond fished out a cigarette out of his pocket.

"I, uh, I could do it. I'm known all over the world as ultimate as Ultimate Handsome Lifeguard Usopp who has saved over a billion lives all over the Grandline."

"Oh?" An impish gleam snuck onto the cooks features. "Well I'll consider the position filled then. You don't mind that it's a nude beach do you?"

The vision of the cook stretched out naked on a beautiful beach…where Usopps' one duty was to watch him, eat with him, and keep him entertained flitted across the mans imagination.

"Now that does sound like paradise."


	13. College Professor AU

Title: The loop hole  
Words:300  
Pairing:Sanji/Usopp  
Topic: Guidelines  
rating:R

Written:7-20-2008  
notes: An AU where Sanji and Usopp are college professors getting some loving behind the students backs.

///////////////////////

Usopp shrugged off Sanjis' mouth as it invaded his neck.

"Stop it…" he hissed as he turned his head and glared at the blond. In all honesty he wanted him to continue…and even progress further to points where they weren't wearing clothes. And THAT was exactly the problem.

If any of their students walked in, caused a fuss, Usopp: the beloved and best Physics professor would surely become Usopp: the unemployed hobo with good aim. Sanji didn't have to worry, his 'Culinary Arts, Theory, and Practice' program drew enough tuition money each semester he'd never be sent packing.

"You're going to get me fired!" The long nosed professor nearly squealed as both of the chefs hands kneaded his ass. He spun around fully from his desk. "LISTEN! We need to set some guidelines!"

Sanji pushed some papers to the side of his lovers' desk with a sigh before sitting on it in a half lean. Usopp sat in his chair and gazed up at his blond.

"Come on…I wouldn't let you get canned. I'd quit first. No one is on this side of campus this time of day anyway. And the girls were all over me today…I can only remain the professional gentlemen if I know I have you to molest later…"

It was kinda sweet, but the physics professor had already summoned his courage there was no going back now.

"Number one! All intimate contact requires permission! None of this ambush molesting between classes. Giving a two hour lecture on motion, hard and worked up is most unpleasant."

"Professor…may I suck you off?" The look was smoldering and his prey was caught in the spell.

"Please." Usopp covered his mouth with his hands.

Sanji was already locking the door. Damn. Well, maybe the blond had things well in hand.


	14. Eat Me

Title: Eat me?  
words: 167  
Pairing: Sanji/Luffy and some usopp/Sanji thrown in  
topic:classic  
rating: G but thoughts of cannibalism in there.  
written: 6-28-2008

////////////////

From what he had heard, it was a classic dream.

Being chased, feeling like you are running in a muddy slow motion.

The cook would look over his shoulder. Maybe he should be caught, it was just Luffy, after all.

"SANJI!! MEAT!!!!" The wild feral need in the captains eye reenergized Sanjis panicked struggle. Shit! He looked like he was just going to eat the blond once he caught him!

Absently Sanji wondered what he would taste like…and then blushed as he suddenly hoped in true chef fashion that Luffy would like and enjoy it, savoring the chefs flesh.

As Luffy caught up to him, he hadn't fully realized the dream had started changing.

Usopp looked across to the sleeping cook. His sleep had begun as fitful but now was moaning lightly and clutching his pillow.

"Oi…Sanji, I can't sleep when you're like this…" Usopp sighed. He held the pillow over his head to keep the moans out. He hoped the dream was at least about him.


	15. Liquid Courage

_**Where does usopp get this liquer anyway?**_  
Title: Usopps evening didn't go *quite* as he planned.  
Rating: Naughty words/R  
Words:299  
Pairing: Sanji/usopp  
topic: Hedonism

Written: 6-9-2008

////////////////////////////////////////

"Oi, oi! Leave'em! I'll get them later…fshhh…come here for a second!"

Sanji froze as he lifted the empty wine bottle and turned to Usopp. The sniper was drunk…but something seemed off. Sanji walked over with the bottle and bent down to see Usopps face.

"You okay? Don't you usually sing or go perch yourself somewhere to tell your exploits about now?"

The cook wasn't ready for the gentle hand pulling him forward or suddenly to be locked in a kiss with the resident long nose.

When they parted…Sanji was stunned a few close inches away, sharing the same breath as the man.

"What's gotten into you?" Sanji whispered before realizing that was not how he should react. He should kick the snipers lips in, remind him that despite his own good looks he wasn't a lady, and show him to his bed with the understanding that the whole incident would be forgotten in the morning.

Sanji backed up a step and straightened himself.

Usopp laughed and thunked the empty wine bottle on the table.

"This mostly! I asked for some good liquid courage and they gave me this! Check it out! "Heroism"!" He swiveled the bottle to show the label.

Sanji snorted.

"That says Hedonism." Sanjis eyes caught the fine print. " Oi, this has a lot of dangerous herbs and aphrodisiacs in it…it's practically guaranteeing that you're going to get fucked."

Usopp held up a sheaf of packaging in glee.

"It came with a pack of condoms for us to use! Nice huh?"

So he knew what he was doing…

"You know, you're supposed to get the one you want to fuck to drink it…but…I guess with you the opposite is true. Come on- I'll get you to bed, then we'll see if you get lucky after all."


	16. Undefeated in Name Only

Title: Undefeated in title only  
words :252  
topic: Captive  
pairing: Zoro----Sanji/usopp  
rating: Between r & nc-17 cause of nakedness  
written: 5-24-2008

--------------------------------------------

Zoro had to see for himself. It was only a matter of curiosity, really. Usopp had boasted so proudly of being undefeated in chess against that guy. Never losing against that guy! Never ending in a tie with that guy!

And that blond idiot didn't deny it once!

That couldn't be right, Zoro was sure. After all, Sanjis mind was gifted for strategy, although- It was rare he used that aspect for something other than the ships inventory and the supply/demand of certain items. It was one area the swordsman didn't bother to challenge him…

It became clear as Zoro peeked around the corner.

"I'm holding your queen captive Usopp. If you want her returned back, there's no helping it." Sanji quipped as the queen danced between his nimble fingers.

Usopp slowly pulled off his underwear, blushing furiously at his nakedness but with a look that spoke to him having to do this many times in the past.

Sanji placed the queen back on the board. Usopp quickly moved his reclaimed piece to take Sanjis rook.

"Uh oh…looks like your kings about to be captured." Sanji softly intoned to soften the snipers sudden horror.

"If- if…if I distract you like last time…you'll ignore it right?"

"My defeat is in your hands as always…"

Zoro gritted his teeth in frustration as he turned away. He didn't like it. That guy shouldn't loose to anyone else. He adjusted himself as he considered, maybe he should challenge the cook to a game after all.


	17. Usopps Fable

_**Usopps Fable**_  
title: Usopps Fable  
Words: 140  
pairing: Uso/san  
rating: pg  
written: 9-23-2005

Usopp gaped at the sight of it.

"I am the STRONGEST."

"I AM the strongest."

"I am THE strongest."

He quietly snuck by the mirror that held the flexing and posing Zoro. He never would of guess Zoro was that vain...he was going to say so to Luffy but found him similarly preoccupied by the mirror in the boys quarters.

"I AM going to be the king of the pirates!"

"I am GOING to be the king of the pirates!"

"I am going to be THE king of the pirates!"

Again he slipped away in disappointment.

When Usopp snuggled against a certain cook later and told him what he had seen, Sanji just ran a hand through his hair and said:

"To us it might seem vain- but for those idiots it's just practice."

Moral:

Vainity and ego to some is just the preparation to achievement and positive thinking to others.


	18. First Kiss

_**Give it to me**_  
Title: Give it to me  
pairing: Uso/Sanji  
words: 298  
rating:pg13  
written: 8-10-2005  
////////////

Usopp gaped and covered his mouth with his hands in shock. He had just been looking at the sleeping Nami- curious as what Sanji was always going on about.

Nami seemed to have a death aura as she approached him with her staff.

He hadn't expected the ship to lurch suddenly, or that when he stumbled forward it would end up in a kiss.

He threw his arms in front of himself for last ditch protection but it was no avail.

Later, a newly bandaged and battered Usopp made his way into the kitchen for some kind of snack to lift his spirits. His first kiss ended up being one of the most terrifying experiences in his life.

The kitchen door snapped shut behind him.

Oh shit.

How could he have forgotten....there was someone else he had to worry about.

Sanjis voice came behind him.

"Was it fun?" the tone seemed rather cold and deadly to Usopp and was a little reluctant to turn around but did so anyway...choosing to look down then face the blond.

"It was an accident! I was just looking and then the ship...!" Usopp hurriedly explained in a half apology.

"Oh? Was that you your first kiss?"

"What? Um...actually it was!" Usopp suddenly realized.

"I'll forgive you, then."

"Ahh..good." Usopp sighed in relief.

"If you give it too me."

"Huh?"

"Your first kiss- give it to me."

And then before the sniper could flee he found himself in a kiss for the second time today, although this time it was deep and long.

Usopp wondered if an indirect kiss from Nami was so valuable as Sanji opened the door and walked back on deck.

Zoro seemed to be leaning against the railing, smirking.

"You wanted to be his first kiss, huh?"

The cook ran his tongue over his lips-the taste of the other man, before placing a cigarette there.

"Shut up."


	19. Romance Novel

Title: Pirates Passion  
Words: Almost 400  
rating: Pg 13  
pairing: Sanji/captain  
written: 7-29-2005

/////////////////////  
The dark haired pirate captain pulled Sanji up in to his strong arms all at once, and the blonds chest heaved as he struggled to escape the embrace.

"Kiss me." the captain demanded.

Sanji shook his head in defiance. He had promised himself that he had got on the ship for his own dreams and not to be with this indomitable presence that possessively held him now.

"I will..nohmmff!" The refusal muffled as his lips were assaulted by the captains. A tongue slipped by his own and did some dance he wasn't familiar with leaving him feeling warm, wet, and shamefully dirty.

He felt like he should cry. Somehow he had hoped his captain wouldn't be like this, and yet as the captain ripped open his shirt and ran a hand down the length that had just been wrapped in expensive fabric...his voice betrayed him and moaned.

The captains lips hung over the nape of his exposed neck.

"Can I help you, first mate Zoro?"

"Sorry captain, I didn't know you had claimed her." The swordman grumbled.

"That's right, as captain I get first pick at all treasure we get! However if you're lucky maybe I'll share my jewel, later."

Sanjis mind screamed at the thought of being passed around to the crew, like some whore, despite the rough good looks of the first mate. The ever probing hands under his clothes, chose that moment to use one of his secret techniques. techniques...and Sanji moaned again.

The first mate chuckled before walking away satisfied at the promise of a new whore.

The captain dropped Sanji when he was out of view, and sanity reigned again causing Sanji to slap his captain.

"Sorry, but a classy woman like you wouldn't last a moment unclaimed. "

"Oh Captain!" Sanji swooned with understanding..."."

Sanjis foot came down hard forcing the book deep into the cracks of the now splintering wood.

" I understand this is the only book left of interest and you're bored, but must you read out loud and change the names?"

Usopp held his hands out defensively.

"Just trying to gain Luffys interest in reading."

Sanji cast a glance to his wide eyed captain and sighed.

"At least get my gender right!" he grumbled as he shuffled away.

Luffy pulled the book out of the boards and handed it back to Usopp.

"I want to hear more about me and Sanji!"

"Huh? I haven't made a part for you yet."

"Then who is the captain?"

Usopp blushed furiously.


	20. Missed Chances

_**A missed Chance**_  
title: A missed chance  
pairing: Usopp/Sanji and a little Zoro...  
words:247  
rating: R  
written: 5-18-2004

* * *

Zoro's hand froze on its way to the handle to the mens bunk. It was the middle of the day but the door being closed was rare and often meaningful...perhaps he should knock. As he pondered this, Usopp's voice came clearly through the door in muffled moans.

"Oooooh oh ohhh..Sanji....yeah...like that...mmmm.."

Zoro backed away from the door in shock. Sanji was with Usopp?! That seemed so unfeasible...and yet when he thought back on it..it made a damn lot of sense. Well now people would stop thinking he and Sanji were an item at least. Not that he minded the insinuation...not that he would ever admit that without the cook making a similar confession first anyway. Feh, what did he care? Obviously Usopp was Sanjis playmate for now.

He started to walk down the hall when he came face to face with a moist Sanji fresh from the shower, with only a mint green towel around his waist.

"Change your mind?"

Zoros mind caught up and realized what Sanji's presence in the hall meant.

"Uh, no...Usopps just you know...busy." He made a general motion and averted his eyes.

"He started without me? Damn...well I'm going to go give him a hand. Wanna come?"

Zoro looked at the blond chef stupidly. This had to be a bad joke.

"Uh no."

Sanji smirked an evil looking smile.

"Suit yourself." He shrugged as he slipped through the door.

Zoro watched after him for a moment before continuing down the hall.

"Damn."


	21. Something Warm

_**Something warm**_  
Title: Something Warm  
Rating:Pg13  
Pairing: Sanji/Usopp  
Words: 296

Written: 1-8- 2004

/////////////

Usopp stretched in exhaustion and rubbed his eyes. It was almost done! He looked at his watch. Shit, midnight, he had been working on his newest gizmo all day and now most of the night. Might as well pick it up tomorrow after some sleep. He stood shakily as the blood rushed back into his legs and he began to lurch over, when strong hands took hold of his shoulders firmly.

Usopp whirled around. No one should be up at this hour, what if some invader had boarded the ship?! He whirled so fast the top of his head came into something solid.

Sanji rubbed his bruised chin and glared at the ships handyman and turned to leave.

"Wait! Sanji! I..didn't think anyone would be up! I thought you were a burglar or something!"

"Why would a burglar keep you from falling?" The blond asked as he stopped and leaned on the door frame, apparently looking for a smoke.

"Well, why would you? You shouldn't be awake now."

Sanjis eyes hardened for a moment and he approached Usopp with a serious scowl.

"I wouldn't want you hurt. We've always been on good terms haven't we?"

"Well, yes."

"Friends?"

"Of course!"

The blond cook took the shorter mans chin in his hand and smirked as a small blush graced his cheeks.

"Then of course I'd worry if you missed several of my meals. I've been keeping something warm for you...come on." Sanji explained softly in Usopps ear before turning and walking with the man into his kitchen, letting Usopp enter first.

As Usopp entered, the chef had one arm wrapped around his chest from behind and deftly unhooked the mans overall straps. Usopp whirled around again but Sanji dodged this time and countered with a long warm kiss.


End file.
